Relationships Today

It used to be that when two people decided to be a couple, the guy would give the girl a pin, a sweater, something and then tell their friends they are "going together." This usually occurred after they had dated each other exclusively for a few months. Today, they do it quickly and post it on the Internet.

Yesterday, I took Jackson and Arriana (a nice girl who goes to St. Charles and attends Regina who Jackson danced with at a Sweet 16 party a few weeks back) to lunch and the DIA after church. Then last night, I check out Jackson's Facebook page and wo, there is a photo snapped with his phone of the two of them at the Museum. His profile now says he is "in a relationship."

Maybe, I missed something but the two have gone on a total of two dates (three if you count the party where they reconnected) and have talked on the phone a lot. Is that a relationship?

I am so old.

My Mental Health Projects

Since I know your day wouldn't be complete without me boring you with my weaving projects, I thought I would show you what I just took off the loom. MaryBeth, my fabulous co-worker, had a birthday this week so I weaved over the weekend, washed and tied on Monday and gave this scarf to her on Tuesday. I wasn't feeling the pattern while I was weaving it but now I really like the verticalness of it. Very different. Usually, I have a little longer to bond before I give away my work but she's worth it. I used that rik rak for the first time and it really had a nice smooth feel once it came together.

My loom at CCS has a indigo-dyed tencel warp with big white patches ready to be woven on Saturday. I'll have to take a photo to show you how odd it looks. It reminds me of a blueberry cow hide. Not sure how it is going to all come together. My plan was to use a straight green tabby but maybe I need a new plan. At home, I just wound a forest green cotton warp for an overshot table runner that I saw in Handwoven magazine. I know I'm supposed to be creative and experiment but it is sure nice to have a pattern once in a while that tells you exactly how many ends, etc.

Jackson Left for West Point

Jackson, my over-the-top, 16-year old, ROTC-lovin' baby, is now at West Point in upstate NY. He left yesterday at 6 p.m. and they drove all night, getting there early this morning. Their schedule is grueling. He'll go to classes and sports with the student he gets assigned to for the next two days, eat in the dorms and essentially be a cadet for 48 hours. He gets home around 8 a.m. Saturday morning. I get a quick text this morning from him. All it said was "Is anybody there awake?" Guess he's already buying into the military intelligence thing.

I'm hoping it will be a great experience for him and that it motivates him to start thinking about college pretty seriously. Also hope he doesn't sign anything with a U.S. seal at the top while he is there!

The Blind Easter Egg Hunt

Aunt Sue made blindfolds for all the cousins today and had them find the Easter Egg candy, necklaces and other goodies on their hands and knees. It was a sight to see...or not see! Since the kids are getting too old for Easter Egg hunts and the smallest kids (Ben and Lauren) weren't there, it was a great compromise. It also gave the parents lots of laughs.


Baby Dawson also got lots of attention. I just got back from a short run. Man, I've eaten too much fabulous food this weekend. I'll be glad (not really!) to get back to my work routine tomorrow.

I love Easter

Just a little chocolate, a bit of church and lots of family time. Next to Thanksgiving, Easter is one heck of a holiday. No stress. Just togetherness. Perfect. Now if we could get Spring weather to go with it, it would be great. They're predicting 2-6 inches of snow this weekend. Unbelievable.

This and That

We had a great weekend...action packed but fun. Let's see....Saturday AM I went to Heritage Spinning and Weaving in Lake Orion with my CCS buds. I was good and only bought one skein of very cool hand dyed yarn and two small cones of green bamboo yarn. I'm going to use the bamboo as weft with a warp I dyed with indigo last week. We'll see. Mollie gave me the eyebrow in the store and said "why green?" She's much better at colors than me so we'll have to see how it all comes together when I do a small sample.

Hannah and I went to see the University of Detroit High School performance of Grease that evening over at the Detroit School of the Performing Arts. It was great. We parked the car at DSA and then walked over to Union Street and then back for the play. I love Midtown! Jackson went to a Sweet 16 party for his friend Alexus that night and I think he impressed a whole bunch of lovely ladies. They've been calling nonstop ever since.

On Sunday, we did our annual St. Patrick's Day shenanigans at the Parade in Corktown. Jackson and I ran in the Corktown Races (4 miles!). Jackson, Lynn and Lisa had great times. Let's just say I finished. I have a long way to go to get my running mojo back after the long winter. We then hung around with the Greening of Detroit and marched in the Parade. I wish I had brought my camera. Nathan was adorned in a tree costume again and Jackson was part of the shovel brigade. Think of six guys singing and performing precision drills with shovels. He did great. I can see why he is good at ROTC. He spun that shovel like it was a baton. Boy there were a lot of drunks in Corktown Sunday afternoon!

We got out of the Parade around 4 and made it to St. Clare for the Winter Sports Banquet at 6. Hannah's basketball team didn't have the greatest record but I really liked her coach. Ro even got an award as the volunteer of the year.

Last night, I treated myself to a little St. Patrick's girl time with Linda and Kim. So nice to kick back. Kim and Linda are both running successful businesses, balancing a family and enjoying life! I think we only gossiped about half our friends so we'll have to do it again soon. Linda does PR for Morton's Steakhouse so we ate like queens!

Tomorrow night, we have to go to a parent meeting for the West Point trip. I'm anxious to learn more. Jackson leaves next week for three days. Hannah starts her vacation on Thursday so she is going to a sleepover tomorrow at Alex's house. Not sure how I'm going to pick her up the next morning since I have to work but I guess I'll deal with that as it comes.

Back to American Idol......this season isn't thrilling me.

Kwame

I am sitting here as a national NPR story is airing about the sad, sad state of affairs in Detroit with our goofy Mayor's text messaging scandal. Our Mayor needs to resign. His ego is an embarrassment. Our family works really hard to continually convince people why we live in the city. Usually our arguments are hanging by a thread at best. Stuff like this makes it even harder. A story this morning in the Free Press brought it home for me. The mother of his former chief of staff was quoted in the paper about how worried she was about her daughter and her grandchildren. Christine Beatty at least had the guts to resign right away. Her Mama has to be proud about at least that fact.

Here's hoping the prosecutor finds something that sticks to King Kwame so we can kick his sorry behind to the curb!

Getting to Know You

My buddy Corinne sent me this quiz so I thought I would post my answers on this old blog. (Boy, I am so glad the writers are returning to work so I can get back to Desperate Housewives on Sunday night instead of goofing on the computer!)

Welcome to the 2008 edition of getting to know your friends. Change all the answers so they apply to you, and then send this to your friends including the person who sent it to you. The theory is that you will learn a lot of little things about your friends that you might not have known!

1. What time did you get up this morning? 7:00, with a slight hangover from last night's auction at the kids school (thought it was 6:00 but the time "sprung forward" on me) and a million things to do for Carolyn's shower today
2. Diamonds or pearls? Definitely diamonds, pearls are for old ladies
3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Jumpers (it was stupid)
4. What is your favorite TV show? Grey's Anatomy
5. What do you usually have for breakfast? Fiber One bar and coffee
6. What is your middle name? Marie
7. What food do you dislike? Tuna
8.What is your favorite CD at the moment? Sheryl Crow
9. What kind of car do you drive? Buick Enclave
10. Favorite sandwich? Grilled cheese
11. What characteristic do you despise? Petite :)
12. Favorite item(s) of clothing? My worn out green fleece Greening of Detroit jacket
13. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? China
14. Favorite brand of clothing? Dana Buchman (bought on sale on EBay)
15. Where would you like to retire? Asheville, NC
16. What was your most recent memorable birthday? They're pretty low key
17. Favorite sport to watch? Anything the kids are in
18. Furthest place you are sending this? You tell me
19. Person you expect to send it back first? Not sure, I broke the rules by putting it on my blog.
21. When is your birthday? August 25, 1963
22. Are you a morning person or a night person? Morning
23. What is your shoe size? 9
24. Pets? Java (goofy mutt we adopted at the zoo)
25. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with us? Hannah is going to go to Liggett and Jackson got selected to go on a recruiting trip to West Point.
26. What did you want to be when you were little? Stewardess
27. How are you today? Glad the busy weekend worked well and is over
28. What is your favorite candy? Swedish Fish
29. Favorite flower? Purple iris (I copied from Corinne)
30. What is a day on the calendar you are looking forward to? Hannah's 8th grade graduation
31. What is your full name? Colleen Marie Robar
32. What are you listening to right now? Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen
33. What was the last thing you ate? Tom Yum soup from Sala Thai
35. Do you wish on stars? Doesn't everyone?
36. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Red
37. How is the weather right now? Chilly
38. Last person you spoke to on the phone? Neighbor
39. Favorite soft drink? Diet Coke
40. Favorite restaurant? Mama Rosas (closest one to the kid's school so I don't have to cook!)
41. Hair color? Definitely not gray
42. What was your favorite toy as a child? I can't remember
43. Summer or winter? Fall
44. Hugs or kisses? Hugs
45. Chocolate or Vanilla? Definitely chocolate
46. Coffee or tea? I am addicted to coffee, bold and black
47. Do you want your friends to email you back? Sure.
48. When was the last time you cried? Got teary-eyed at Carolyn's shower today when Sue talked about missing her Aunt Wilma
49. What is under your bed? Yarn (in a big plastic bin)
50. What did you do last night? Went to the Auction at the kid's school
51. What are you afraid of? Not having an answer to all these questions!
52. Salty or sweet? Salty
53. How many keys on your key ring? Way too many for stuff I don't even have any more
54. How many years at your current job? 6 months at Crain this time (although I was there for ten years from 1990-2000)
55. Favorite day of the week? Saturday (weaving class!)
56. How many towns have you lived in? Four
57. Do you make friends easy? Yes
58. How many people will you send this too? The sorry souls who come across my blog
59. How many will respond? Don't know
60. Who sent this email to you? Sammy sent it to Corinne who sent it to me.

Whew....I finished!

Isn't Baby Dawson cute???

Live in the Moment

My Mom sent me this and I thought it was beautiful. These are great words, especially as Hannah and Jackson are getting closer and closer to college and independence. It came from Anna Quindlen, Newsweek Columnist & Author:

All my babies are gone now. I say this not in sorrow but in disbelief. I take great satisfaction in what I have today: three almost-adults, two taller than I am, one closing in fast. Three people who read the same books I do and have learned not to be afraid of disagreeing with me in their opinion of them, who sometimes tell vulgar jokes that make me laugh until I choke and cry, who need razor blades and shower gel and privacy, who want to keep their doors closed more than I like. Who, miraculously, go to the bathroom, zip up their jackets and move food from plate to mouth all by themselves. Like the trick soap I bought for the bathroom with a rubber ducky at its center, the baby is buried deep within each, barely discernible except through the unreliable haze of the past.

Everything in all the books I once poured over is finished for me now. Penelope Leach., T. Berry Brazelton., Dr. Spock. The ones on sibling rivalry and sleeping through the night and early-childhood education, all grown obsolete. Along with Goodnight Moon and Where the Wild Things Are, they are battered, spotted, well used. But I suspect that if you flipped the pages dust would rise like memories. What those books taught me, finally, and what the women on the playground taught me, and the well-meaning relations --what they taught me, was that they couldn't really teach me very much at all.Raising children is presented at first as a true-false test, then becomes multiple choice, until finally, far along, you realize that it is an endless essay. No one knows anything.

One child responds well to positive reinforcement, another can be managed only with a stern voice and a timeout. One child is toilet trained at 3, his sibling at 2.

When my first child was born, parents were told to put baby to bed on his belly so that he would not choke on his own spit-up. By the time my last arrived, babies were put down on their backs because of research on sudden infant death syndrome.To a new parent this ever-shifting certainty is terrifying, and then soothing. Eventually you must learn to trust yourself. Eventually the research will follow. I remember 15 years ago poring over one of Dr. Brazelton's wonderful books on child development, in which he describes three different sorts of infants: average, quiet, and active. I was looking for a sub-quiet codicil for an 18-month old who did not walk. Was there something wrong with his fat little legs? Was there something wrong with his tiny little mind? Was he developmentally delayed, physically challenged? Was I insane? Last year he went to China . Next year he goes to college. He can talk just fine. He can walk, too.

Every part of raising children is humbling, too. Believe me, mistakes were made. They have all been enshrined i n the 'Remember-When-Mom-Did ' Hall of Fame. The outbursts, the temper tantrums, the bad language, mine, not theirs. The times the baby fell off the bed. The times I arrived late for preschool pickup. The nightmare sleepover. The horrible summer camp. The day when the youngest came barreling out of the classroom with a 98 on her geography test, and I responded, 'What did you get wrong?'. (She insisted I include that.) The time I ordered food at the McDonald's drive-through speaker and then drove away without picking it up from the window. (They all insisted I include that.) I did not allow them to watch the Simpsons for the first two seasons. What was I thinking?

But the biggest mistake I made is the one that most of us make while doing this. I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of the three of them, sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages 6, 4 and 1. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night.I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less.Even today I'm not sure what worked and what didn't, what was me and what was simply life.

When they were very small, I suppose I thought someday they would become who they were because of what I'd done. Now I suspect they simply grew into their true selves because they demanded in a thousand ways that I back off and let them be. The books said to be relaxed and I was often tense, matter-of-fact and I was sometimes over the top.And look how it all turned out. I wound up with the three people I like best in the world who have done more than anyone to excavate my essential humanity. That's what the books never told me. I was bound and determined to learn from the experts. It just took me a while to figure out who the experts were.

I love snow!

We got socked with about eight inches last night. Both kids are off school. Jackson and Denzel are over at Autorama helping the Explorers get their 400 hp. convertible Cobalt ready to go for this weekend's show. Hannah has been goofing on the computer all day. It was strange to just come to work today without first dropping off kids at school. I got in at 7:30.

We have a crazy couple of days ahead of us. The school auction is Saturday night and Carolyn's shower is Sunday. Autorama happens all weekend so we'll be back and forth to Cobo quite a bit too. It is probably a good thing the kids got a chance to chill a little today.